If you want or need to become a happier person, the best way is to build more positivity into your life. Believe it or not, this isn’t as difficult or complicated as you may think. There are actually many things you can do to add more positive experiences and fun into your life.
“The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude.”
The Power of Positivity
The wonderful thing about positivity is that it doesn’t just affect one area of your life.
It affects every area of your life.
The happier you are, the more you lean into the best version of yourself. This creates a ripple effect—when you’re filled with joy and peace, you become a better parent, a better spouse, a better friend, a better employee, an overall better person.
So, how exactly does being positive affect you? Here are just a few ways…
Positivity makes it easier for you to achieve your goals.
That’s because when you’re in a positive frame of mind, you can make better decisions.
You can look ahead and plot a course, rather than just reacting to the setbacks you encounter.
It’s also easier to ask for help when you’re feeling positive.
This means when you see an obstacle in your path, you’re more likely to reach out to a mentor or coach for advice. Soaking in their wisdom can be just what you need to overcome your obstacle and find success.
Positivity improves your health.
One way that positivity can boost your health is by lowering your blood pressure and heart rate.
When you’re experiencing negative emotions like anger or fear, your body will begin to produce adrenaline, the flight-or-fight hormone. This response is necessary in an emergency like if you’re being chased by a tiger. But when you’re faced with something a little less intense like turning a report into your boss or having a serious discussion with your spouse, that adrenaline response not only isn’t necessary, but can actually be quite detrimental to your mental and physical health.
Being a more positive person makes it easier to relax and manage stress, so you don’t have to spend your life feeling like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster.
Positivity increases your satisfaction in life.
It’s easy to get focused on everything that’s wrong in the world and spending your wanting what everyone else has.
But all of that wishing and jealousy is just another form of negativity.
When you choose to embrace positive thoughts and focus on the things you’re grateful for, you stop the comparisons. Instead, you can see all the amazing things around you—like your friends, family, and beloved pets.
Positivity helps you grow.
Positivity prompts you to take risks and try new things. For example, you might experiment with taking piano lessons and discover that you love the instrument or you might try running and find your new favorite exercise routine.
Of course, being positive and taking a risk doesn’t mean everything will turn out the way you’d hoped. But even if it doesn’t and you maintain a positive outlook, you’re still sure to walk away with valuable experience and wisdom that you can share.
Now that we know WHY we would want to add more positivity to our lives, let’s talk about the HOW…
Techniques for Developing a More Positive Mindset
A positive mindset can be yours if you believe it can be.
Some may think they’re just born negative or that it’s part of their personality and they can’t change that.
But that’s just not true.
Anyone can change their outlook with the right tools and some time.
If you’re struggling to develop a more positive mindset, try using one of these techniques…
Don’t Be Afraid to Streak
When you do a certain number of activities in a row, your brain gets a tiny boost of endorphins.
Game creators use this technique, which is why many virtual games require you to “chain” an action. For example, during a cooking game, you may have to chop the vegetables, stir the soup, and serve it to a customer.
When you do those same actions repeatedly, your brain releases endorphins as if you’d done the same thing in the real world, instead of the virtual one.
Now that you know this secret, you can use it to your advantage.
If your goal is to get healthier, track your water consumption and try to drink 8 glasses a day. Building your online business? Try to write one blog post every day. If your trying to improve your relationship with your significant other, then make it a goal to do three kind things for them each day.
Change Your Language
The average human has around 40,000 thoughts a day and the clear majority of them are negative.
But the good news is that boosting your positivity can be as simple as changing your thoughts.
Start listening for certain keywords in your mental soundtrack and change them. For example, instead of thinking, “I suck at drawing,” focus on the positive by saying, “I’m learning to improve my artistic skills.”
When it comes to your mindset, look for phrases like: never, hopeless, impossible, too late, not enough, or worthless. You may not realize it, but when you think these words, you’re sending a subtle message to yourself that’s filled with negativity.
Be Open to Change
Many people associate change with something negative. For example, you might think of a move to another city only in the terms of what you’re giving up, like your local friends, your favorite deli, and your comfortable apartment.
But change can bring amazing things into your life.
People with a positive outlook know this and that’s why they don’t fear change. They choose to embrace it.
If you’re worried about an upcoming change, make a list of all of the positive things that could happen as a result.
View Everything as an Experiment
It’s easy to approach life like it’s a test and there’s only one right answer. But the truth is there can be many answers and all of them can be right, depending on where you find yourself right now.
For example, you might think that trying a new vacation spot is a terrible idea. You go to the same beach every summer and you like it that way. But what if your soulmate is hiking the Grand Canyon and you miss each other because you weren’t willing to change your plans?
Approach your new ways of being with an open mind and a willingness to experiment.
Go ahead and take that art class you’ve been dreaming of, ask out that cute guy at your office, or go on a road trip adventure with your best friend.
Developing a more positive mindset won’t feel natural at first. It might even seem a bit cheesy to you. But if you keep reaching for the positive, you’ll experience a radical mindset shift in no time.
What to Do If You Fail to Be More Positive
So now you’ve set a goal to be more positive and let go of negativity. Maybe part of that goal was to stop yelling at your kids and start praising them instead. Perhaps your ambition was to stop smoking and take up weight lifting…
But another day or week has passed and you’re feeling down. In your mind, you’ve failed…again.
You’re convinced that you’ll never be able to make better choices. The same old habits are creeping in.
You’re wondering if lasting change is even possible.
When you fail to be more positive, here’s what you need to do…
Some people struggle with this concept. They spend time constantly focused on what they did wrong and why they’ll never reach their goals. This type of thinking creates mental quicksand that will keep you from becoming your best self.
When you think of your failure, try to tell yourself something positive like, “Today is a new day. I forgive myself and release any guilt I feel over the past. I will not dwell on it. Instead, I’ll see today for what it is – a beautiful chance to start over.”
You may have to say this to yourself a few times throughout the day, especially if you struggle with guilt or shame.
Self-forgiveness is like exercising—the more you do it, the easier it becomes.
Review Your Failure
Without blaming yourself or wallowing in shame, look at why you failed.
Be honest about the thoughts or situations that may have influenced you. For example, you meant to think more positively about your relationship but you picked a fight with your significant other instead.
Consider, what may have prompted you to act this way. Were you hungry? Did you have a bad day at work? Were you frustrated about something else and your spouse was simply the closest target?
Was there a deeper issue in play? Are you resenting your partner’s sudden success in one area? Were you feeling insecure or worried they might leave you?
Obviously, there’s no excuse for taking out your negative emotions on a partner. But taking the time to dig in and discover what’s really going on in your heart gives you the ability to learn from your experience.
Make an Action Plan
Now that you know what prompted you to lean into negativity, make a plan to overcome it. For example, if jealousy was the reason you spent the afternoon tearing down a co-worker, think about what you could do differently.
You could start by creating a positive mantra like, “I release all jealousy and resentment toward my co-worker. Instead, I embrace the fact that there is enough positive attention to go around.”
If you were feeling insecure in your relationship and it led you to pick a fight, you might want to choose a mantra like, “My partner and I are in a stable, committed relationship, and he (or she) loves me for who I am.”
At first, these positive thoughts might be difficult for you. But when you feed your mind positive and truthful statements, you’re psyche makes them reality.
When you fully embrace them, it will start to affect your actions. No longer will you feel the need to gossip about your co-worker or belittle your partner’s accomplishments. With your new positive outlook, you’ll find it easier to be generous with others and support them.
Repair Your Relationship
Once you have an action plan for moving forward, you may still find yourself having to stop and heal your relationships. This is especially true if you have emotionally injured someone you care about.
For example, if you were unkind to your sister because you’re afraid of losing her, you need to talk with her. This is not the time to justify your actions. Instead, explain what you did and apologize for it.
If your sister or another person you hurt asks, you can share what prompted you to act that way. This can also be a good time to mention what you’re doing to ensure it doesn’t happen again. You might say, “I was worried I was going to lose you. So, I pushed your buttons to start a fight on purpose. In the future, I’ll just be honest and tell you that I’m feeling insecure.”
These admissions are never easy but they do set the groundwork to begin healing a relationship. But keep in mind that though someone may forgive you easily, it can take time to rebuild trust and intimacy after an emotional betrayal.
Different Ways Negativity Can Manifest in Your Life
Let’s talk about the different ways that negativity can manifest in your life and your business.
Procrastination = Hidden Negativity
Often, procrastination is a sign we’re holding onto negativity about the project or assignment we’re supposed to be doing. For example, if your boss expects you to learn how to do quarterly reports and you’ve never done them before, you might feel overwhelmed. Perhaps you even think, “I’ll never get all the work done. It’s too hard for me. I’ve never been good at simple reports.”
Because of these negative thoughts, you put off working on the reports.
You do this week after week until you realize you only have three days left to get the work done. Then you have to scramble and hope you can get them done on time.
If this scenario sounds familiar, you’re not alone.
Many people struggle with procrastination for years because they don’t realize it’s a mindset issue. But once you know this, you can begin to work at having a better attitude instead of the one that led you to put off important work until the last possible minute.
Learning as a Mask for Fear
While it’s important to be educated about what you’re doing, some people use ongoing education as an excuse for not taking the big leap.
Understand that this negative mindset is your brain trying to be helpful. Your brain fears all change and it tells you that you can have everything you want, just as soon as you’re “ready.”
This creates a negative cycle that leaves you feeling stuck and frustrated.
Rationalizations that Sound Good
For some people, negativity manifests as a list of excuses that rationalize why you’re not living the life you want. You might say, “I want to have a healthy relationship with a loving partner but every marriage in my family ends in disaster.”
The reason rationalizations are popular is because they sound like they’re true and they’re usually hard for others to challenge. For example, you say, “I want to go after my dream of becoming a singer but I can’t afford to quit my job.”
But the problem with rationalizations is they’re like watching your dreams slowly die.
You may even get sympathy and understanding from those around you. They’ll reconfirm your justification by say things like, “Of course, you can’t. No one expects you to rise above this obstacle. It’s just too much.”
You need to fight against rationalizations with everything in you.
Many people have healthy relationships, despite coming from difficult home lives. There are dozens of singers who worked two or three jobs until they hit it big.
Don’t let negativity manifest in your life as procrastination, over-preparation, or rationalizations. If you recognize these attitudes, take steps to overcome them so you can become the best version of yourself.
If you would like more Affirmations that you can use every day,
Grab my “30 Positive Affirmations for Health & Happiness” checklist NOW.
Use Positive Affirmations
Your thoughts are the soundtrack of your life.
This is why, one of the best ways to build more positivity and make room for more happiness in your life is to use positive affirmations. If you change the soundtrack and make it positive, your life will begin to reflect these changes.
Here are just a few ways you can add more positive affirmations into your day…
Pick one positive affirmation and journal about it. Don’t be afraid to explore it in-depth. Think about what it means to you and how you’d like to live it out.
For example, if you want to make a serious life change, you could journal about the positive affirmation, “I am the master of my fate.” Doing this helps you realize that you are in charge of your life and you will need to take responsibility for the choices you are making.
Put Them on Your Ceiling
Create your personal affirmation and put it on your ceiling in your bedroom. This is very effective because the affirmation will be the first thing you see each morning and the last thing you will look at before you go to sleep.
Make Sticky Notes
Sometimes, the best reminders are physical ones. They help keep a message or mantra front and center in our minds. Keeping positive affirmations around you is especially important when you’re beginning a new journey.
You can put these notes all over your house where you are sure to see them when you most need them. For example, on your mirror or the refrigerator, or even in your car.
Create a new background on your phone. This way, every time you look at your phone you’re reminded of your goal. As a bonus, you could create an alarm on your phone so that each time your alarm goes off, you see your affirmation.
It can be helpful to take time each day to visualize your affirmation. For example, if your affirmation is “I love and approve of myself” then you might imagine giving yourself a hug or visualize being surrounded by a pink aura of self-acceptance.
Positivity Affirmations to Improve Your Life
Now that you know how to use positive affirmations, here are a few you might want to implement in your life…
I am in charge of how I feel and today, I am choosing happiness.
I attract abundance and wealth easily.
I choose to be kind to myself.
I will not compare myself to others.
I am the master of my fate.
Experiment with some or all these techniques to help change your mental soundtrack. You might feel silly or uncomfortable doing them at first, but just like most everything, the more you use them, the more confident you will feel using them.
If you would like more Affirmations that you can use every day,
Grab my “30 Positive Affirmations for Health & Happiness” checklist NOW.